Ramadhan...

This will be my second Ramadhan back in my place after spending five Ramadhan at where I studied…

During Ramadhan, I prefer to fast at my place. Food taste nicer and it is cheaper too. Maybe it is just because I like to break my fast with local food.

Spending Ramadhan at where I used to study was not really that bad. I do not have problem with people eating in front of me. We are supposed to fast during Ramadhan while running around doing our daily life as usual. I find it weird that people here have to go home early, cannot do certain tasks and etc just because of fasting. That should not be the case…

The simplicity of breaking the fast and doing other ibadah there are not the same as in my place.

To be able to eat food from lots of different Muslims countries are just amazing.

The best advice I ever have for Quran reading, I got it in Ramadhan too… It is about how people nowadays try to finish the Quran or Qhatam as many times as possible in Ramadhan. Now it is not exactly a bad thing but with the focus more on just finishing rather than trying to understand it, we lose out on understanding Islam more.

It is best to have everything in moderation. Read Quran and understand it at the same time. I was told to read the meaning after reading it in Arabic. So that we can reflect and understand the messages relay to us from Allah…

May we gain more Iman and Taqwa through this Ramadhan…

Insyaallah…

Of Going Here and There...

Life after my graduation has been so unpredictable so far.

In a way, it is good because I get to do stuff I had only dream of when I was studying.

I graduated with high expectation of getting a job fast. Now, I am kind of expecting another no from another company I applied to. Like many people had said, a really bad time to graduate and to look for a job.

I am grateful that, while waiting to land a proper job, I had a part time job. A job where you will get more pay if you work more hours. With nothing much to do, hey, that will do. At least, I could pay for my stuff, bills, food (which was lots and lots of food) and courses.

It does feel good not to depend on my parents to do stuff that you want to do. Now I had lost that freedom until I get myself a job… Which can be any time now… Preferably NOW!

I do kind of hate to shift around. This time I had to move lots of stuff… Cripes, all the rubbish I had been collecting all these years, are truly rubbish. Books on the other hand, I could not part with. Sail with me to another place until we can get a proper place for ourselves.

I do not mind going around, as long as money keep coming in…

Trapeze and dream...

I had got what I have been wanting for long, long, long time…

There is a point in my life that I had fallen in love with circus. I still love them just that you don’t get to see them that much nowadays. My mother used to take us to circus every time they hit the town. Usually I will get to go to the circus more than once every time they were in the town. My mother didn’t really mind taking me to the circus anyway…

I dreamt and still dream of being in the circus. The clowns are my favourite. Still remember all the antics when I saw them first time in the circus when I was very young. I loved the part where they get to water the audience with a hose… Clowns always seem to get away with stupid pranks.

Another favourite of mine, trapeze and the tightrope walking… I don’t really mind high places. So I guess, that wouldn’t be a problem when I get to do them. Flying trapeze is the best! You will get the flying sensation. Just pure greatness…

When I come here, where I am now, I came across this circus school. I was really ecstatic. I mean, it is very hard to come across these things nowadays. To find a school here was really like I had finally met my love…

Then, I didn’t get to go for any classes until only recently. Mainly because my financial status cut me off from circus thingy… When I get to do trapeze and cloud swing, my first thought were, I should have done this earlier… I had missed a lot. Still, I get to feel it in my life. If I had the chance in the future, I will definitely do it again. Go further into the circus world…

Once again I had stepped out of one of my most beautiful dream, not knowing when I will be there again…

Friends of mine...

As I live longer in this world, I have notice things that also give value to people you call hmmmm friends…

Lots and lots of things you can argue on how to measure a friend, but I personally give importance to five things of which two I will talk about in this post.

One of it is money. It shows something if someone willingly helps when you are in a financial tight spot and also very generous with the time for you to pay their money back. Also it shows something if a person settle his debt in timely manner.

I have met people who love to encourage you in buying something so that they can also benefit from the thing I will buy. Sharing is good but to the extend you are being used is not really appealing. Especially when we are friends, I would have thought there should be a balance in giving and taking.

I would think that a person is a good friend if that person happily chips in buying a movie that we can watch together, agree to share batteries for electronics games that we play together, split the receipt of groceries for meals we share together and so on. Basically for someone who just happily ignore or I do not know how to say it, just enjoy whatever it is like a parasite, gaining something from someone resources without for them to put in anything is just plain sick and cheap.

Unless that person clearly said that he wanted to gives something for everyone to share, do try to share in buying stuff that you know you will share or for food you will consume together. It is just plain annoying to state that everyone should chip in whenever someone buys something for everyone. It also helps to ask whether that person is alright to buy it or ask whether he wants to share the cost. Be considerate if we are to be friends…

The other one would be borrowing things. I do not mind you using or borrowing my stuff, but do please return them. As Soon As You Had Use Them. You will never know when I will have that cake making mood and I want all my stuff there when I am in the mood to bake a cake. Or do anything with the stuff you guys borrowed even. There are times I wished I had written the name of people who borrow my stuff. My stuff grew less and less and I do not know who uses them.

But, I also think that those stuff and money people borrowed and the amount of time taken to pay or give them back just shows how much of friend they are to me. It is useless to keep forwarding nice messages of friends, to celebrate friendship days or anything that have anything to do with friends, if you cannot even give my stuff back or pay whatever you owe me.

There are also people who did not like you later on in their life but still kept your stuff and seem like never to return it. Well… To be honest, they had never returned any of it. And I would think that, since they did not like me anymore, they would give it back so that they would not have to be reminded of me anymore through the stuff they had borrowed from me. Nope, it never works that way so far. Friendship ended, my stuff is theirs.

Friend or no, please have the courtesy to return the stuff. Or at least replace it. Whether you like me or not, is not it a responsible to give back what is not yours? GIVE BACK MY STUFF IF YOU DO NOT LIKE ME FOR IT IS STILL MINE!

All I know is, those people whom I never get to see again ever since the day they borrow my money or stuff, are possibly better off not to be my friend anyway. Possibly, they worth as much as the stuff or amount of money they borrow. To think how much more I would have lost should they become my friend, I shudder at the thought of it…

Red eyes to white eyes Spiderman...

Finally, another deed is done. I had bought this Spiderman t-shirt last summer. Thought it was cool and it still is. It is not everyday you came across a good design of Spiderman on a t-shirt. So no regret in buying that t-shirt…

The only thing is, I do not really like the whole red Spiderman on the t-shirt. Spiderman white big bug eyes are his trademark. Without those eyes on the t-shirt, somehow the design looks so wrong.

Thus, with my free time in my hand and also a big bottle of white fabric paint, I decided to paint those red eyes of the Spiderman, white.

Because the area to be painted is considerably small and I was basically painting over hmmmm… the t-shirt design, it was such an easy task to be accomplished.

Few minutes after that, after tweaking and minor alterations to my painting, I have got myself a Spiderman t-shirt with his usual white bug eyes! Now that is cool and Spiderman looks more menacing and scarier...

That is more like it…

Friends...

There was once a boy who had lots of friends.

More than the number of fingers on his hands.

More than any of us could comprehend…

Only time would not be his friend.

As time moves forward, his friends grew less.

And less…

At first, the boy fights back.

Letters upon letters sent to his friends.

Gathering and get together to keep the friendship tie strong.

But time proves to be very wily.

Marriage, work, children and distance were not a great help.

Thus his friends became people that he knew off…

Thus his friends became memory of past…

Only then he knew time was not the culprit.

For friendship cannot thrive from one side only.

A letter sent and not replied does not mean a thing…

A gathering called without attendees is meaningless…

The boy work hard to catch his friends.

So that they will be his present, not past.

As time goes on, he stops, tired weighing on his shoulder.

As time continues on, he waits for a friend to come by…

For a friend who is truly a friend…

The Cold is Here...

It is that time of the year… The only time I hate this place…

Yes, the time has arrived finally. This is when my skin will crack and dry out. If I am lucky, I will bleed too… Lovely…

As the skin get drier, the itchiness will start to creep on my skin too. Somehow, they really love to creep as close as possible to my bleeding crack too. That is when I will also contribute to widening the river of blood on my skin…

All this will happen if I do not apply moisturiser cream on my skin… No moisturiser cream means hello wrath of cold winter. I really dislike the smell of moisturiser cream before. To be honest, the ones I have before were handed down from my friends who left for good from this place. So it was my fault for not getting something that smell better to me…

My last trip out of this place not only was memorable but also I had bought myself a bottle moisturiser cream. And it is not any moisturiser cream too; it is also a bottle of chocolate moisturiser cream! How fun can life be?

So now I get to smell chocolate every time I smear it on my itching skin. Marvellous, the smell will guide me to chocolate dreamland when I am asleep… So now, this time around, when the fury of cold winter has descent to this place, I am protected by the chocolate, the chocolate moisturiser cream…